TULSA, Okla. — After an Owasso High School student died Thursday night, the district deployed additional counselors to lend support to the community.
Once students leave school, though, they may be more dependent on their loved ones and close circle. There are a variety of organizations that families in the area can turn to for guidance.
Family and Children Services is one of them. They have therapists embedded in school sites as a part of their general work, but when an incident happens, staff take it to the next level.
"We do something called psychological first aid, which is like mental health CPR," said Faith Crittenden, FCS's Senior Director of Children's Mental Health Services. "Coming in after something tragic has happened, helping [staff and students] deal with that immediate stress, helping them reduce the stress, and then maybe identifying for those who may need ongoing or staff who may need ongoing resources after the event."
On-campus resources may be more attractive to some students, rather than talking about it within their homes, so that base is covered.
However, when students do come home, whether or not they have talked to a professional already, it's ideal to create an open safe space. Crittenden said there is not one best practice to respond to something traumatic since processing trauma or grief is an individual experience, and everyone does it differently.
"You don't have to say the perfect thing," said Crittenden. "Really just being available, modeling, talking about feelings, talking about how are you hearing it or experience it is making you feel and that will create a really nice port of entry for your kids to feel that their feelings are normal and open up some conversation and dialogue around the issue."
Shock and confusion will be top of mind for many in situations like these, as word can spread and details may not always be accurate.
Creating a line of dialogue that allows a child to work through stress, anxiety and shock may be the best way to be there.
"They maybe don't know how to process their feelings or even identify what they're feeling," said Crittenden. "So just talking with them about the thoughts that are running through their head or maybe even the images because we think in thoughts and we think in pictures, so what are some of the pictures that are even coming through your head?"
It is normal for children to react to a tragedy or loss like this - being quiet, isolated and feeling lost.
However, Crittenden said the four-week mark is when it is likely time to consider professional help.
Family and Children's Services has telehealth counseling, outpatient treatment, support groups and a variety of other supportive resources available.
Their Community Outreach Psychiatric Emergency Services (COPES) crisis line can be reached at 918-744-4800.
Crittenden also gave resources from the National Child Traumatic Stress Network, which has tips for child caregivers to help work through grief.
The Parent-Child Center of Tulsa is a local non-profit dedicated to educating parents on the best ways to protect and nurture their children. They provide counseling, and individualized information to support the community.
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