TULSA, Okla. — The latest data from the FBI shows Oklahoma as the eight-ranked state for most women killed by men. The study shows 91 percent of women were killed by men they knew - in most cases a boyfriend or husband.
The previous year, Oklahoma ranked third.
“If you are feeling oppressed, mistreated, like you have no power in a relationship just reach out," said Lori Gonzalez of Domestic Violence Intervention Services in Tulsa. "Domestic violence is a pattern of power and control tactics."
20 years into helping domestic violence victims, Gonzalez is all too familiar with the tactics oppressors use. She said it usually begins with isolation - shutting off the woman's phone or getting them fired from work - then separation from all friends and family.
"Then it just get worse and worse," Gonzalez said.
So bad in fact, Gonzalez was not surprised to see the murder rate for these Oklahoma women. She said there are not enough support shelters and services around the state to help abused women, and she said advocates are not as preventative as she would like.
"A lot of what we do is reactive," she said.
Gonzalez said action from anyone helps. If close friends or family notice red flags in a relationship, she advises them to offer the woman help or just let her know she is not alone even if she does not want to hear it.
“It can become frustrating when somebody you love stays in an unhealthy relationship…it becomes important for that person to know, ‘Hey, I’m always going to be here for you,'" Gonzalez said. "Any support is great support."
If you find yourself or someone you know stuck in an abusive relationship, DVIS asks you to call its 24-hour crisis line at 918-743-5763 or text "SAFE" to 207-777.
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