TULSA - I have been asked to do the impossible.
It would be easier to climb Mt. Everest.
Simpler to avoid traffic at 71st and Memorial.
Less hectic to find Christmas presents for my wife, who is an absolute cinch to return anything I buy for her.
I have been requested to pick all 35 BOWL GAMES!
From the Godaddy.com Bowl to the Heart of Dallas Bowl (which is in the Cotton Bowl but not the Cotton Bowl game). That's at Jerry's World. The Cotton Bowl game that is.
We have 6-7 teams in bowl games. Teams without head coaches.
What did I do to deserve this? And they want scores to boot!
Let the games begin, which they do actually, on Dec. 15.
It begins in Albuquerque. The New Mexico Bowl, Arizona vs Nevada. Both teams 7-5. Both get the bowl game swag before anybody else, and get to spend the rest of the holiday vacation watching games, and not practicing for games. Go Nevada here. Maybe they actually want to be at this game. I'll give em a score, 47-45 for the guys from Reno.
Famous Idaho Potato Bowl - Makes sense, this one in Boise. 9-3 Toledo vs 10-2 Utah St. Hey folks, Utah St may have been the quietest good team in the country. I will not be able to watch this game however. The blue turf makes me sick to my stomach. Can"t even watch the highlights. Someone call me with the final. Only if I pick it correctly, though. Utah St wins easily 44-13.
Poinsettia Bowl in San Diego - BYU at 7-5 vs San Diego St. 9-3. Rooting for Aztecs here because BYU was lucky to beat TU last year in Dallas. Hey, we have 35 games to pick, can't have legit reason for every pick. Besides, SDSU lost to TU in what was once the Freedom Bowl in 1991. And they had Marshall Faulk and still they lost to the Golden Hurricane. 35-31 Aztecs.
Beef O' Brady Bowl in St. Pete, Florida - Ball State and Central Florida - UCF has a good QB, may drive Ball St. nuts. UCF 31-24.
New Orleans Bowl - Where is this game? Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? Who cares about this game? La-Lafayette vs East Carolina. This is what is wrong with the bowls. LA-LA is awful. OSU could have scored 100 points on them in September. And they are in a bowl. OUCH! Can't pick them for that very reason. EC 34-23.
Macco Bowl in Las Vegas - Now we are talking. Vegas baby! Will either team be awake enough to play this thing? Washington and Boise St. I say Pac-12 team has more fun, and stays up later. Boise wins 28-19.
Hawaii Bowl - SMU and Fresno -Coach June Jones goes back to old stomping grounds, but still loses. Common opponent is TU. SMU beat TU, Fresno got beat by TU. Still, Bulldogs get it 24-21.
Little Caesers Pizza Bowl in Detroit - Nothing says bowl trip like the Motor City. Plenty of activities, as long as it is inside. With plenty of pizza. Central Michigan vs Western Kentucky. Bobby Petrino is the new coach at WKU, and no truth he will have a blonde on the back of his motorcycle leading the parade to Ford Field. Go Central here. It is a home game for them, 37-33.
Military Bowl in Washington DC - Bowling Green vs San Jose State. San Jose is another team that lost its coach. San Jose big favorite here. Go other way for the fun of it. Bowling Green, 37-34.
Belk Bowl - I will admit, I have no idea what a Belk is or was or could be. In Charlotte. Duke vs Cincinnati. Did we mention Cincy has a new coach who left two Texas Tech recruits at the dinner table right in the middle of the meal? Go Duke. At least they are smart, 33-17.
Holiday Bowl in San Diego - Rumors have it this bowl has really fallen in the excitement department. Don't believe it. The most beautiful city in America. How bad can it be? UCLA and Baylor here. I'm going Big 12. Baylor, 56-47.
Independence Bowl in Shreveport. Listen to this. I grew up in New York. Worked in Green Bay. Now get this. The coldest I have ever been for a football game was in Shreveport in 1988 when Tulsa played Oregon. Brutal. I have bad memories in Shreveport. La-Monroe plays Ohio. Monroe beat Arkansas, remember. Ohio has lost three of the last four. Go home team, 35-21.
Russell Athletic Bowl - Now here is a real jockstrap-type of game. This is in Orlando. Not a bad trip. Rutgers and Virginia Tech. This has been a horrible year for the Hokies, and it stays that way. Rutgers, 41-36.
Meineke Car Care Bowl in Houston. Minnesota 6-6, vs Texas Tech 7-5. Bad game. Kingsbury returns to Tech and destroys Gophers into the ground, 55-23.
Armed Forces Bowl in Ft Worth. Rice 6-6 vs Air Force 6-6. Wow! Loser finishes season below .500. TU had to scrape to be the Owls. Going with Rice, they need something good to happen. 7-6 would be nice finish. 33-23.
Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl in San Francisco - Game played at SF Giants ballpark. No room for end zones. Arizona St vs Navy. Todd Graham auditioning for new job, runs it up on Navy to continue his non-goodwill tour. 45-13 ASU.
Pinstripe Bowl at Yankee Stadium - West Virginia against Syracuse. There is no way Orange will keep up with Mountaineers. Holgorsen will also run it up because of worse than expected season, 75-33.
Alamo Bowl in San Antonio- Still trying to figure out how OSU got left out of this one. Goes to Texas instead. Longhorns continue underachievement tour and lose to Oregon St, a team that likes to hit. 33-31 Oregon St.
Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl in Tempe -TCU and Michigan State. TCU about to score, and grounds-keeper turns on sprinklers to trip Horned Frog at the one as time runs out. Quadruple overtime. Frogs win anyway when Buffalo Wild Wings has to close at 2 a.m. Michigan State finishes season 6-7.
Music City Bowl - Vanderbilt gets to play at home in Nashville, and will clobber opponent NC State. They too have a coaching change.
Sun Bowl in El Paso, Texas. Georgia Tech and USC. There is no way this game should be played. Tech is 6-7 for crying out loud. USC with the domination 66-20.
Liberty Bowl in Memphis- Tulsa and Iowa State in rematch. Ridiculous matchup. Iowa St beat TU in the season opener, but TU may have gotten better as the season went along. Cyclones may be in for a coaching change before this game. Go TU, 33-31. By the way, OSU should be the opponent.
Chick-Fil-A Bowl in Atlanta- Clemson and LSU - Loopy Les has no offense, and that is music to the ears of former OU defensive coordinator Brent Venables. Clemson wins in a bit of a surprise, 24-20.
Gator Bowl in Jacksonville - Northwestern vs Mississippi State - How could you not root for Northwestern. Smallest school in Big 10, finally having some success. MSU overrated. Go Wildcats, 33-32
Heart of Dallas Bowl at Cotton Bowl - OSU and Purdue - Pokes should be in a better bowl, but will there be a lack of enthusiasm for this one? Purdue without a head coach for this one. OSU should romp if they are interested. Monken gone for head coaching job. Will he be missed? Don"t think so. OSU, 52-20.
Outback Bowl in Tampa - Michigan vs South Carolina - Is it me or am I the only one who has about had it with the ol' ball coach opening up his mouth with some smart alec comment about this or that? Hail Hail to Michigan, 23-20.
Capital One Bowl or the What's in your Bowl in Orlando - Not a very good Nebraska team, that's what. Georgia will clobber the Huskers. If Wisconsin got 70 on the black shirts, Dawgs will get 72. 72-44 UGA.
Rose Bowl in Pasadena - Stanford and Wisconsin - Two tough outfits, but Stanford is better. Wisky also without coach. It is a disease - this no-coach thing. Stanford, 37-34.
Orange Bowl in Miami - No truth to the rumor they will play this game without fans in the stands. Orange Bowl too embarrassed to show this on TV. Will wait for National Championship thank you. Northern Illinois vs Florida State. Seminoles about to lose coordinators. They could lose the entire first team and still win this one. embarrassing matchup, FSU 65-20.
Sugar Bowl in New Orleans - Florida and Louisville - Another BCS mismatch. Not worth discussing. Gators, 56-13.
Fiesta Bowl in Glendale - Kansas State vs Oregon - I am really worried Oregon will run all over K-State unless Bill Snyder can come up with some master plan. Hope it is close. Rooting for Wildcats, so this is not an objective pick. Wildcats, 47-45.
Cotton Bowl - OU and Texas A&M - OU is hoping Johnny Football gets fat and sassy on the banquet circuit after winning the Heisman. This could be the best game on the card, aside from the National Championship. Sooners must bow up on defense for once. Sooners get it done in overtime, 45-42.
Compass Bowl in Birmingham - Are you kidding me? Pittsburgh 6-6 vs Mississippi 6-6. Please. Ole Miss wins 13-10 before a crowd of 2,857. Everybody will be in Miami for the big one.
GoDaddy.com Bowl in Mobile, Alabama - Kent St vs Arkansas St. Both teams without head coaches-Have no idea. Kent St, I guess, 45-44.
BCS Championship in Miami - Alabama vs Notre Dame - Both teams can run. Both teams stop the run. Both coaches are brilliant at getting teams ready. Going with Notre Dame, 17-15. Should be a beauty. Not much to say.
Is that 35 picks in one setting?
They owe me.